Lord Bonkers' Diary: Rutland's computer industry

Thursday

It is true what they say: Britain lacks enterprise these days. Perhaps you saw my recent appearance in the ‘Dragons’ Den’? I offered the assembled moguls the chance of investing in a distinctly promising chimney-sweeping business (the labour costs were extremely low); not only did I not get a bean, but they threatened to call the police!

If I had taken such an attitude back in the 1980s, Rutland would not today be at the forefront of the personal computer industry. Looking back on those days, the machines we sold seem terribly primitive. The first of them was large enough to hold a man standing upright – indeed, it did hide a man standing upright (the Professor of Hard Sums from the University of Rutland at Belvoir) when we won the inaugural British chess computer championships – but we believed in our ideas, and the result is the 'silicon shire’ we see today.

Wiltshire, incidentally, is known as the ‘silicone shire’ because it leads the breast-enhancement industry. Each to his own.

Earlier this week

• Monday: Trapped inside Phil Drabble
• Tuesday: Inside the Liberal Democrat Attack Unit
• Wednesday: The Queen's lorry-driving career