Saturday, April 23, 2011

Lord Bonkers' Diary: Is it worth attending the Liberal Democrat Conference?

Lord Bonkers solves another of his readers' problems.

Now my beloved party is the whipping fag for the Bloody Tories and we have lost all credibility after breaking our gentlemen’s (and, indeed, ladies’) honour, nay pledges, is there any point in wasting my pennies, and even shillings, on attending our annual bun fight and Conference?Auld Leftie of Desborough

Desborough is a splendid town, renowned for its corsetry. The First Lady Bonkers used to obtain her requisites there and was once presented with an Illuminated Address after keeping a whole factory in work through a particularly harsh winter.

As to your question, Auld Leftie, I believe that money spent attending Conference is never wasted. If you don’t approve of the party’s strategy, what better chance will you have of changing it? Put down an amendment or have a quiet word with a junior minister in the bar. I recall throwing a bread roll at Lloyd George at a dinner after he went in with the Conservatives, and I flatter myself that it had some effect.

Earlier this week

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