Lord Bonkers' Diary: Mr Patel was Terribly Nice about it

Friday

A fresh breeze whips up the white horses as my launch powers across Rutland Water. I like to keep an eye on my oil rigs, and there have been reports recently that the feared Rutland man o’ war jellyfish has been sighted close to shore, so you will often find me aboard. Today all is well, so we moor up early for a lunch at the Bonkers’ Arms.

Later I take to the air – or at least my Patent Focus-Delivering Drone does. What with the membership of all parties in historic decline, I reason that we shall have to embrace the latest technology to get the Liberal message across. (This has long been my view: I was, I believe, the first man to employ Bakelite in a parliamentary by-election.)

In all honesty this afternoon’s trial reveals a few teething problems, but Mr Patel was Terribly Nice about it and I shall, of course, pay for any repairs needed to the thatch on the village shop.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary...

Armed to the teeth with duck-handled umbrellas

The current Lady Bonkers

The choirboys' rifle practice

"Who told you that?"

Stoned in Chewton Mendip and Langton Herring