Lord Bonkers' Diary: "Chimbleys is awkward things"

The new issue of Liberator is winging its way to subscribers - why not join them? - which means that it is time to spend another week with Lord Bonkers.

We join him in late December...

Monday

What a wonderful Christmas we had at Bonkers Hall! There was the usual glittering guest list, for the first time featuring the delightful Sarah Olney, the new MP for Richmond Park. (I gather she has a strong following amongst the deer.) There were also a number of former Liberal Democrat MPs who were defeated at the last general election and, to be honest, looked glad of a hot meal. Politics, as I have often observed, is a rough old game.

I was nursing a few scrapes and bruises at Christmas luncheon, having had the bright, as I thought it, idea of dressing up as Father Christmas and having myself lowered down the chimney of the Bonkers’ Home for Well-Behaved Orphans the evening before. Unfortunately, I became stuck and it took some enthusiastic tugging on my boots from the young inmates to free me. As I separated myself from the pile of soot, one of them observed: "Chimbleys is awkward things, Lord B. You wants to leave 'em to the experts." Then the real Father Christmas turned up and was Rather Put Out.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.