Lord Bonkers' Diary: How Matron keeps herself in gin

This is the poster Lord Bonkers is talking about.

Tuesday

One pleasing outcome of this hung parliament is that the Conservatives have been forced to give up their idea of doing away with Clegg’s cherished free school meals, and I am pleased to have played some small part in that. The bright young things in the Liberal Democrat press office rang me during the campaign asking if I could help them source a thin, doe-eyed child for a poster.

I, of course, replied that the Bonkers Hall for Well-Behaved Orphans is simply full of them. In fact, I suspect Matron keeps herself in gin by providing the urchins for the BBC’s adaptions of Dickens, but I do not Make A Fuss About It.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South-West 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary...

• The inside story of the fall of Tim Farron