Badgers stop play at Dudley Town FC

Spare a thought for Dudley Town FC: there last two home games have been called off because badgers have damaged the pitch.

The Express & Star quotes the leader of the local council's explanation of what has been going on:

"We are having problems with badgers, who are digging into the surface of the pitch at the Dell to get at earthworms and other insect larvae and causing damage."

While the club's chairman says:

"We have never experienced anything like this before. We have had problems with Canadian Geese and Foxes but we have lost our last games as a result of the damage it has caused."

Despite what Owen Patterson once claimed, there is no evidence that the badgers have moved the goalposts.