Lord Bonkers' Diary: When Penny and Kemi banged Rishi’s head on the floor

What with one thing and another, there will not be another issue of Liberator until the Liberal Democrat conference in September. When it is published you'll be able to download it free of charge from the magazine's website.

In the mean time, there's a 20-year archive of Liberator back numbers to explore.

But Lord Bonkers was not prepared to wait until September. "This isn't the spirit that won Sutton and Cheam," he remarked. So here we go with another week of the old brute's diary.

Monday

I, for one, am disappointed that tomorrow’s debate between the contenders for the leadership of the Conservative Party has been cancelled. 

I shall have to break the news to the Well-Behaved Orphans when I set down my pen, as they were so looking forward to it. I watched the first debate on my own, but soon grasped that it was intended for a younger audience and had a word with Matron about allowing her charges to watch the second. 

How they booed whenever Liz Truss appeared on screen! (I joined in by calling out "Turncoat!" for all I was worth - I like to improve their vocabulary.) How they yawned when Tom Tugendhat was shown! How they cheered when Penny and Kemi banged Rishi’s head on the floor! 

Indeed, if it weren’t for the intrusive thought that one of the five is bound to become our next prime minister, I should have had my best evening in years.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.