I can see James MacCleary now the Rain has Gone: Lord Bonkers' foreword to the new Liberator Songbook

Journalists have been clutching their pearls for several days, but only now are Liberal Democrats gathering for the Conference Glee Club.

The event is nothing without a Liberator Songbook, and - or so the old brute tells me - a Liberator Songbook is nothing without a foreword by Lord Bonkers.

So here's the one he's written for this year's edition.

Bonkers Hall

Rutland

Tel. Rutland 7

Planning the Bonkers Hall International Arts Festival takes up much of my time over the summer, falling as it does just before the Liberal Democrat autumn conference. (For myself, I tend to fall at or immediately after the conference.)

This year’s programme featured the Elves of Rockingham Forest, who offered ‘An Evening of Aeolian Harmonies (no money returned)’, while the Well-Behaved Orphans put on their traditional gymnastic display. (Only three got over the wall this time.)

Earl Russell’s Big Band made a welcome return after many years, and the Sisters from the Convent of Our Lady of the Ballot Box offered their tribute to the Sex Pistols.

No, you don’t mess with those nuns. I shan’t forget the Mother Superior warning Violent Bonham Carter, the gender-fluid London crime boss of the Sixties, that the convent was “her manor” and that she would “give a slap to anyone who got lairy”. You have to admit she’s got more go than the Revd Hughes.

And I found many talents within the greatly enlarged Lib Dem parliamentary party. Bobby Dean, for instance, enjoyed a successful career singing ballads (rather bland ballads, if I am honest) for white American teenagers until the Beatles changed everything. When I first met Roz Savage, by contrast, she was a member of an all-girl punk group.

Some songs, of course, were written about our MPs. ‘Olney the Lonely’ was occasioned by the writer’s sympathy for Sarah when she found herself joining such a small Commons group after winning her by-election. Johnny Nash, I believe, penned ‘I can see James MacCleary now the Rain has Gone’ after a showery canvassing session in Newhaven.

But enough from me. Enjoy the Glee Club and may you stay forever Claire Young.

Bonkers