Lord Bonkers' Diary: Jardine will not hesitate to give the criminal one up the snoot

The old boy celebrates the promotion of Douglas Jardine, the brains behind the Bodyline tour of Australia.

I never had him down as a Liberal myself.

Monday

My old friend Jo Grimond proved a splendid leader of the Liberal Party, so I have great hopes of Jo Swinson. Already she has shown good judgement by appointing me to the Outer Space portfolio in her Shadow Cabinet and, and this morning I hurry up to Town for its first meeting.

Looking around the table I am heartened by the faces that return my gaze. A fellow called Davey (I didn’t catch his second name) is our Chancellor, while our Foreign Secretary is one Chuka Umunna (note to self: look him up).

I am particularly cheered by the appointment of Douglas Jardine to the Home Office brief. He, I feel sure, is the man to lead the fight against crime: Jardine will not hesitate to give the criminal one up the snoot if he threatens to hang around.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary...

• Young Liberals have been dressed as sheep
• I went through Three Cocks
• Frozen haddock, fashionable yoghurts and Bjork CDs
• Paul sometimes went on a bit