Thursday, June 04, 2020

Lord Bonkers' Diary: I now resemble a beatnik

The work of running a great estate must go on, virus or no virus.

Thursday

How are you finding lockdown? My hair has remained uncut for so long that I now resemble a beatnik, while my moustache is now so wide that there are rooms at the Hall I am no longer able to enter. If this goes on much longer I shall have to call the builders in and have the doorways widened. 

However, I have not let lockdown keep me from Estate business. Consulting a ready reckoner, I find that the distance of two metres we are supposed to keep from one another equates to something a little north of six feet: in other words, the height of a good county seamer. 

Not having one to hand, I have erred on the safe side and kept well clear of my tenants while addressing them through a loudhailer and offering advice on the farming tasks in which they happen to be engaged. 

Looking through my field glasses, I can see they appreciate the gesture – indeed, they often make gestures of their own in return.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary

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