Today the government announced that the John Reid is to be divided into two.
Whitehall sources say that it has been recognised for some time that Mr Reid is "dysfunctional" and that his sprawling career is too complex to have belonged to just one man.
In future there will be two John Reids.
One will concentrate on being the unctuous defender of the realm against terrorism. The other will be the erstwhile drunken brawler who used to admire the Soviet Union and hang out with Radovan Karadzic.
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