Will Rupert Matthews ever be an MEP?

Suddenly a stream of blog posts that would write themselves is under threat.

Because it seems the Conservatives are threatening to take the fish from my barrel by declining to nominate Rupert Matthews as the new MEP for the East Midlands when Roger Helmer stands down on the last day of 2011.

Or so Mr Matthews reckons. He told the Leicester Mercury:

"I sent off the relevant paperwork to the party about three weeks ago. 

"I should have received confirmation 10 days later but I've had no response. 

"Phone calls are not being returned, and my e-mails have not been responded to. 

"I don't know what's going on at the party end."

The Mercury quotes Tory high command as making a strangely non-committal response:

Party spokesman said there was no vacancy as Mr Helmer remained in his post. He declined to comment.

While Roger Helmer says:

"It's supposed to be a formality – the party must do the usual background checks and then issue a certificate ... 

"Unless he turns out to be an axe murderer or a child molester or has defected from the Conservatives to the Communist Party in the meantime, then he should get the seat. 

"But now central office is saying it's not as straightforward as that and that they could bring someone else in. 

"Rupert was selected as a Tory candidate at the last election by 3,500 party members, and 370,000 people voted Conservative in the East Midlands. 

"He has a democratic mandate. If the party proposes to give the seat to someone else, I would have to think very carefully about whether to resign."

I have reason to believe that it is not Mr Matthews' view that "The evidence for UFOs and for the humanoid creatures linked to them is pretty compelling" that worries his party. Nor will they be concerned at his belief that European Union Panzers may invade Britain, as that now seems within the mainstream of Conservative thinking.

No, if the Tories are worried about Mr Matthews it will be because of his association with UKIP's Bill Etheridge.