Wednesday, April 14, 2021

Lord Bonkers' Diary: Make the Wise Woman of Wing a peeress

Lord Bonkers once offered the observation that the Wise Woman of Wing was "Terribly Wise".

I think he was on to something.

And there really was a Wise Woman of Wing, you know.


"What you people have to do, dearie, is stop attracting new groups of supporters and then letting them down as soon as the election is over." 

My interlocutor, you will not be surprised to learn, is the Wise Woman of Wing. I have popped over to her cottage to pick up a herbal tonic for my moustache, which is none the better for its long experience of lockdown, and the conversation has turned to the fortunes of the Liberal Democrats. 

She is definitely On To Something. I remember when Clegg came to Leicester during the 2010 general election and made a beeline for Del Monte University so he could be photographed with crowds of adoring students for the evening papers. The next thing the aforementioned students heard, he had stiffed them all for their course fees. 

Then there was the 2019 election, for which we hit upon a slogan that was unparalleled in effectiveness since the days Gladstone was wowing the burgesses of Midlothian. I am talking, of course, about the masterly “Bollocks to Brexit”. Many pro-European types were won over to our cause, only to hear Ed Davey tell them that Brexit was here to stay as soon as the election was gone. 

I once suggested to Charles Kennedy that he make the Wise Woman of Wing a peeress - I wish he had taken my advice.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West 1906-10.

Earlier this week...

No comments: