Lord Bonkers' Diary: A foul-smelling bird of uncertain temper

Lord Bonkers loses no opportunity within the party's inner counsels to oppose any move for us to have a new logo. The reason, I now realise, is that he doesn't want to be faced with playing host to "that wretched creature" for the rest of its days.

Saturday

Libby, the Liberal Democrats’ mascot, is, as I have observed before, a foul-smelling bird of uncertain temper. When I give her the run of the Bonkers Hall Estate over the summer recess so she can breathe some fresh country air, it generally proves more of a duty than a pleasure. Of late, however, Libby has revealed an unexpected sense of humour. She has taken to impersonating a vulture and circling the skies above the constituency offices of Conservative MPs with small majorities. Already, more than one junior minister from Surrey has handed back his portfolio after being haunted by her. This evening I tell mine host at the Bonkers’ Arms all about her exploits in the hope he will reconsider his decision to bar her after that affair with the pickled eggs last year.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.

Earlier this week in Lord Bonkers' Diary...

• We have talked of little but Europe ever since
• "Beelzebub’s Brownies"
• I toss the volume aside
• A feathered headdress on state occasions
• All over the herbal tea market like a boss