Thursday, July 30, 2020

Lord Bonkers' Diary: 'Layla Moran Saves Ducklings from Drowning'

It seems Lord Bonkers has been playing a more important role in the Liberal Democrat leadership contest than I realised.

No ducklings were harmed in the writing of this entry, so I shall vote for Layla Moran.


I ring Layla Moran with the news about her radical stance, only to find her a little downcast. It seems the slogan Freddie and Fiona wrote for Ed Davey - 'I’m very important and wear a suit' - is hitting the mark with the Liberal Democrat membership and she is at a loss to know what to do by way of a response. 

I tell her of an old friend who was faced with the loss of his marginal seat, only to be returned with an increased majority after rescuing a child from drowning. The most important thing, he always maintained, was that he ensured no one spotted him pushing the child into the water in the first place. 

"Baby animals are popular too," I remark, just before bidding her farewell. Sure enough, the evening papers all bear the headline 'Layla Moran Saves Ducklings from Drowning.'

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary:

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