Friday, September 25, 2020

Lord Bonkers' Diary: Haddock and chips (hold the mushy peas)

Liberator is now a free online publication, but Lord Bonkers is carrying on regardless.


Did you know the new leader of the Liberal Democrats is a man who serves in a chip shop in Stockport? Extraordinary, isn’t it? 

I was in that town today to buy a new fedora and decided to treat myself to a fish supper before turning in for the night. So there I was ordering haddock and chips (hold the mushy peas) when the fellow introduced himself. As he was wearing a visor it was hard to make out everything he said even with my ear trumpet turned to 11, but it was something about wanting to listen to me. 

I was forced to reply as follows: "Young man, that is not a good idea. First, the people behind me in the queue want their chips every bit as much as I do and, second, if you have made the effort to get yourself elected as the leader of one of our historic political parties, I rather hope that it will be worth my listening to you."

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.

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