Wednesday, February 14, 2024

Lord Bonkers' Diary: The board of Thames Water, Mauricio Pochettino and Nigella Lawson

And so we start another week at Bonkers Hall. The old boy has always been fond of a list, but I think he's on to something here. All these calls for people to resign ignore the fact that many of Britain's problems are systemic and won't be solved just by appointing different people to head unreformed organisations.


These days I feel a little nervous opening my morning newspaper in case Ed Davey has called on me to resign. 

It’s a particular hobby of his, you see. While leader of the Liberal Democrats, he has, with mixed effect, called for the resignations of, amongst other, Boris Johnson, Kwasi Kwarteng, Cressida Dick, Dominic Cummings, Chris Grayling, Priti Patel, Mark Field, Rishi Sunak, the former BBC chairman Richard Sharp, the board of Thames Water, Mauricio Pochettino, Nigella Lawson, Benedict Cumberbatch, Fatima Whitbread, Kirsty Wark, Kirsty Young, Jonny Bairstow, Rosie Holt, the late Dame Anna Neagle, the Rutland Water Monster and the Dalai Lama. 

Though he did score a bullseye with Margrethe II of Denmark the other week, I draft a memorandum this afternoon that advises him to knock these calls for resignation on the head and talk instead about the need for closer economic relations with our friends in Europe.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.


Crewe Gwyn said...

The old boy's still got it!
Spot on as ever.

(That's my peerage for services to the party gone. Again.)

Anonymous said...

Absolutely. All those good people named should still be in their jobs.

Or perhaps not

David Raw said...

It would be a bold but much appreciated gesture, if he applied this approach on a more autobiographical basis.