Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Lord Bonkers' Diary: Nick Clegg gets a haircut

Our week at Bonkers Hall continues.


Not having seen Clegg at Westminster for a good couple of weeks (really, he must buck his ideas up if he wants to become Prime Minister), I was more than a little surprised at his appearance when I came across him at Harrogate. I feared that his past delinquencies involving rare cacti and safety matches had caught up with him, as he was sporting just the sort of haircut the authorities favour at the Jack Straw Memorial Reform School, Dungeness.

I was assured by his staff that he had not absconded from the aforementioned establishment but had “changed his image” because floppy hair did not fit well with the Credit Crunch.

Talking of Harrogate, I fear I somewhat blotted my copybook there. Introduced to a distinguished speaker from America, I inadvertently put the point of my shooting stick through his foot while emphasising a point about Free Trade. He let out the most ear-piercing scream.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South-West 1906-10.

The week so far

Monday: Shooting squirrels with Lord Redesdale

Tuesday: Giving Jonathan Ross both barrels

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