Wednesday, February 07, 2018

Lord Bonkers' Diary: The Texas Schoolbook Suppository

From BBC News:
A councillor suspended by her party for saying US president Donald Trump should be beheaded has been reinstated. 
Laura Benson posted on Facebook she hoped Mr Trump would be assassinated for allowing remains of legally-hunted elephants into the US. 
Liberal Democrat party leaders said her remarks were "extremely tasteless".
God knows what those party leaders will make of Lord Bonkers' comments here.

They should remember, however, the old saw that it is better to have an eccentric peer inside the tent than outside the tent accompanied by trained militiamen, elven archers and Well-Behaved Orphans armed with catapults.

Anyway, today's entry completes are latest visit to Bonkers Hall.

The Texas Schoolbook Suppository

I should have known a main with that hairstyle would turn out to be untrustworthy. This morning I learn that Trump has cancelled his visit on a perfectly bogus pretext. My old friend Obama could not have sold the US embassy in Grosvenor Square if he had wanted to, for the very good reason that the Americans never owned it in the first place. It remains firmly in the hands of the Duke of Westminster.

As my regular readers will know, I am not a vengeful man, but I am forced to conclude that Trump has Gone Too Far and Something Must Be Done. So I am urging my American friends to arrange a Presidential visit to Dallas, the home of the fearsome Texas Schoolbook Suppository. It did for poor Jack Kennedy and I have no doubt that it would do for Trump too.

And the mooning? I suggest we save that until the Duke of Rutland is asked to open a village fete that I had rather had my eye on myself.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South West, 1906-10.

Previously in Lord Bonkers' Diary

No comments: